Let me tell you a story:
A girl who enjoys writing and creating art wants a place to express her thoughts and feelings as she prepares to enter a new stage of her life, so she creates a blog. She comes up with a fun name, spends hours designing the site itself and making it look just how she likes, and finally it all comes together into something she’s really rather excited about. She writes her first few blog posts about various things, manages to persuade some of her friends to follow the blog…
And promptly disappears without a trace. After promising not to do that very thing.
Hi guys, I’ve done it again. *sigh*
The whole point in starting Nor Bid the Stars Farewell when I did was to spend some substantial time writing during the summer and have the blog going steadily by the time school started back in the fall. But a few things I didn’t expect came up, including spending half a month away from home and having some very complicated things to work through concerning my last two years of high school.
All excuses aside, I do want to apologize for deserting you all, and pick back up where I left off. And I want to establish what I’m going to be doing with this blog.
Something that I’ve found to be a terrible hindrance when it comes to my writing is that I find myself wanting to wait until I have a fully formulated and polished idea before I even begin the writing process. With TEP, I tried to only publish blogs or podcasts when I had a well-developed and clearly-defined topic to center them on. I didn’t always do a fantastic job with this, but it was the (often unspoken) goal.
I don’t want to do that here. I don’t think that’s why I created this blog, or what I need it for. I want this place to be much more personal, and a huge part of my life right now is this moving process that we’re going through, and all the moments of frustration and despair that go along with it, as well as the moments of grace and joy. I just want to share what’s going on in my life. I don’t want to be seem presumptuous in saying this – I really don’t know how many people care to read about what I’m doing or thinking about or reading or listening to. But since these are the experiences I’m having, they’re what I’m best equipped to write about. And writing IS why I started this place.
So if you all don’t mind, I’d like to share what’s been going on in the last couple of months:
As I begin writing this, it’s a Sunday afternoon, and one of my sisters is preparing a cake in celebration of our mom’s birthday. I’m currently cuddled up with my baby sister while we watch a very old episode of Doctor Who (from 1972, in fact). Apparently I’ve managed to create another nerd girl over the last couple of months by allowing her to occasionally join me in my Classic Who watch. Not I that I’m exactly complaining about it… 😉
It feels like everything is pretty much normal – each of us enjoying our own hobbies and pastimes, sometimes joined by the others, going about our day-to-day tasks, carrying on just as we have for the past several years in our home here in this valley between the mountains of West Virginia. But in reality, life is more complicated and crazy than it has been in a while. The evidence is scattered across the house in the form of clothing and other belongings, some in piles to be driven to the local goodwill, some prepared to pack away indefinitely, and some being readied to be moved to a small house in North Carolina.
Since the year began, we’ve had our lives and our plans turned completely on their heads. Due to a chain of major and completely unexpected events, we’re having to move to a completely new area for the third time in the last ten years, and while I know that’s not really that much by the standards of many families, it’s not something that will ever become easy for mine. As my family homeschools, some of the frustrations associated with moving to a new area aren’t as fully realized for me… but they’re replaced with other struggles that traditionally-schooled students would probably never ever think of. Multiple times in the last few weeks, I’ve found my mom on the verge of tears after many hours of trying to figure out how to prepare for the coming year. We thought we knew what we were doing. We had plans fully laid out and ready to set in motion. Now it feels like we’re starting all the way over from scratch.
So how am I handling it? Well, there’s been a lot of coffee and mint tea, my favorite playlist of folk-ish music full of literary references, and quite a bit of that ’70’s Doctor Who I mentioned earlier. Saturday was almost entirely devoted to washing, drying, and sorting mountains of clothes. I discovered that I have a serious problem with hoarding fandom t-shirts, and that I’m 100% capable of turning my phone’s internet access off to power through housecleaning without distraction. I’ve discovered some beautiful Instagram accounts that are reminding me to keep my eyes open for the grace and joy and beauty through the craziness. I spent several hours the other morning in my study Bible, investigating some passages pertaining to the love believers are called to show towards one another.
Ya know, the funny thing is, even though all the frustration, stress, and straight-up complexity of trying to move (trust me, there’s a LOT of all three of those things), I feel like I’m learning about living “in the moment”, making small goals for myself and focusing on those, and trusting that God will work out everything in the end.
Finally, I’m realizing just how many amazing people God has put into my life in these last few years. I went through a time not long after we moved to our current home where I felt so lonely. I didn’t know anyone and had no idea how to meet new friends. Now, I know some absolutely incredible people (from church, from class, from the internet) who have helped me so much, and I’m so thankful I’ve had the opportunity to have them in my life.
Alright, I’ve rambled on enough for now. 😛
Before I go, I do want to state that I’m planning to be more intentional about posting here in the future. In fact, I’m currently working on a review for the epic 20th Anniversary release from Big Finish, “Doctor Who: The Legacy Of Time”, which I finally built up to nerve to purchase last week and have not regretted one bit (which is saying a lot, because parting with money is extremely hard for this perpetually-broke teen XD).
In closing, have this picture of some ducks feeding in the pond at our local park. They put a smile on my face, and maybe they’ll make you grin too. 😀